Lazio vs Juventus: Preview, Plus Post-Game Post-Mortems

By: roberto | December 13th, 2007
   

I’ve chocked bigger men than you!So, how have you been? It’s nice to be writing again. What have you been up too? How’s the backhand? We haven’t spoken in a while… I know I know it’s all my fault. I’ve been a terrible blogger as of late and possibly an even worse undergrad. Funny I should mention my recent troubles within academia, it seems The Old Lady has put out a few troubling performances as well. To give ya’ll the gist we’ve had an unfortunate draw against Milan, an upsetting loss against Empoli, and a sterile performance against Atalanta. Yup, that sounds worryingly familiar. Well, all but the sterile part I swear. So, as I get back into the swing of things before this Saturday’s match against Lazio, here is the much anticipated match preview followed by a few weekend’s worth of recaps for your reading pleasure. Buon Appetito!

So, this weekend somewhere between our Friday night hangovers and our Saturday night pre-drinking festivities our beloved Old Lady squares off against those boy in blue. As we travel to the Stadio Olimpico di Roma to face Lazio, Juventus will have to put aside a few turbulent performances in order to successfully win in front of what will certainly be a very hostile crowd of 82,000 tifosi. Coming off a fresh thrashing against Real Madrid on Tuesday, which sent them packing from European competition this season, Lazio will most certaintly want to put aside their own recent shortcomings as well. That said, expect a fucking barn-burner.

No charitable Empoli-like Ranieri here, expect him to field a similar line-up as he did against Milan. With the exception of Molinaro who may or may not be replaced by Criscito after Cristian’s hand surgery might leave the left wingback on the pine. What will be interesting to see is if Ranieri will opt for a 4-3-3 formation or use his more popular 4-4-2 scheme. Seeing as Iaquinta and Del Piero both turned positive performances against Empoli, most notably after Almiron’s sending off, Ranieri might indeed ‘tinker’ with a three men attack including the ever diabolical Trezeguet. It would certainly keep Lazio on their toes. However, for this to happen our midfielding usual suspects of Nocerino, Zanetti and Nedved would have to have another extraordinary output to not only sustain and control possession, but attend to their already fairly large midfielding defensive duties against Lazio. So basically expect a 4-4-2 without Del Piero and nevermind anything I just said.

Juventus Line-up:
Trezeguet–Iaquinta
Nedved–Zanetti–Nocerino–Salihamidzic
Molinaro–Chiellini–Lego–Zebina
Buffon

And our stocks will rise!On the other side of the ball you have your favorite fascist soccer club who brought the soccer world such greats as Sinisa Mihajlovic the free-kick Serbian superhero, Alessandro Nesta, Paolo Di Canio (as seen in photo), and the ever youthful Pavel Nedved. It’s true it’s true, despite rumours of Nedved’s birth on the alien planet Krypton, before being rocketed to Earth as an infant by his scientist father moments before the planet’s destruction and crash landing on a soccer pitch in Turin, Nedved was acquired from Lazio by Juventus in what would turn out to be Lazio’s greatest export in the region’s entire history of existence.

As far as their formations go, expect a 4-3-1-2 with the likes of Rocchi and Pandev upfront tesing Lego and Keyser Giorgio. As their centrocampista, the talented 23 year-old Mourad Meghni will take on the duties of the supplying Rocchi and Pandev ahead of his three supporting classmates in Mudingayi, Ledesma and Mutarelli. Lazio’s defensive duties will have the unenviable task of trying to contain Trezeguet and Iaquinta with the likes of Scaloni, Siviglia, Cribari and De Silvestri. Then you have their 43 year old stopper Ballotta. He’s no Oliver Khan, so pressure that defense and have them play some balls back to nonno over there. You see, most men Ballotta’s age spend their days diving for fresh clams and muscles. They don’t handle the pressure’s of twenty-somethings running after them very well so they resort to single stroke motors and small fishing boats that navigate the calm waters of the Adriatic. Pressure this guy and SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT Nedved we’re talking to you. If he can pull a fucking rabbit out of his hat at 43 and have the game of his life, fine there are things in the universe we’ll never be able to explain but don’t let nonno off easy that’s all.

Lazio Line-up
Rocchi–Pandev
Meghni
Mutarelli–Ledesma–Mudingayi
De Silvestri–Cribari–Siviglia–Scaloni
Ol’ Gus Chiggins

Prediction: Lazio 1 – Juventus 3
Trezeguet (17′) Iaquinta (35′) Rocchi (17’sh) Nedved (32’sh)

Serie A: Day 15 vs. Atalanta

Nedved’s blast against Atalanta saves three points to keep pace with InterWere do I begin? Ahh yes the excuses. Well really, our only credible excuse would have to be Camoranesi’s adsence. Now I knew he’d be missed, but I really never grasped just how badly we depended on his services until seeing our last match against Atalanta. Wow, for the most part we looked like frustrated Alaskan fishermen trying desperately to secure a payload of king crabs minutes before the end of their fishing season (don’t bother asking me how I came to that conlusion I have no clue). Our defense and midfield were rushing every bloody pass. At times when Nocerino or Zebina weren’t giving away the ball, our effectiveness at stringing more then 5 passes together was squandered by a premature long ball or an ill-conceived through pass. I could go into more detail but I’d prefer to stop the bleeding. I mean they’re professionals and it’s only 5 fucking passes guys. By the fourth your already in great shape to open up defences. One touch here, two touches there, one cheeky back heel here, step into ball and shoot. But does anyone listen, no of course not. So, the Blonde Bomber had to tutor us once again on how to get the job done, thankfully. Bravissimo Nedved!

Right about now I would normally go on and on about Nedved’s hair (God its looked as radiant as ever), but in light of Camoranesi’s recent health complications which could have him sitting out for a few months (FUCK), I thought Camo should enjoy a little limelight. I mean they say positive energy helps to heal whats ailing ya’, so Camo I’m gonna focus all of my white light towards you homie.

Frustrating indeed as Camo picks up another injuryI’ve said this time and time again, with Camoranesi in our line-up you’d have to be dumb, deaf, and blind to ignore how different a side Juventus becomes. No one in Serie A, or anywhere else as a matter of fact, has touch or hair like this gringo. He gets controls of the ball no matter how retarded the pass. He looks up, mind-fucks a few defenders, and then does something positive almost every single fucking time. He was the connection between our midfield and attack that was sorely missed against Atalanta, Empoli and Milan. Get well soon Mauro. We need you. Hell, I need you. I’m a mess without you. I miss you so damn much. I miss being with you, I miss being near you. I miss your laugh. I miss your scent; I miss your musk. When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together.

Remember his little golden nugget against Caliari?

Ya that just happened. Enough said.

Coppa Italia: 8th Finals First Leg vs. Empoli

Pozzi celebrates after scoring the opening goal against Juventus On to the Coppa Italia. I was genuinely excited for this one, really I was. Not because the Italian Cup is our Champions League this year (hardly), but because of the individual showcasing appeal this match had. For starters, I thought Ranieri had a brilliant pre-game approach to this one. He put his money where his mouth was and publicly offered a platform for the unpopular Tiago and Almiron to showcase their talents and prove their cases for a deserved crack at the starting eleven. At the same time, many eyes would also be on our Empoli-loaned Juventus-owned starlet Sebastian Giovinco as he had his very own case to argue as well.

“I miss Lyon”Right from the opening whistle it seemed Empoli just wanted to win more than we did (aren’t we used to hearing Juve’s name in sentences like that?). Giovinco (who will most certainly get the call up in June) was the driving force behind most of their attack which seemed to blanket any attempt Juventus made at responding. With a cutting run into our final third, Giovinco nicely set up Luca Antonini who then crossed for Nicola Pozzi to put Empoli ahead 1-0 on the 20th minute. Things went from bad to worse for Juve. Neither Tiago or Almiron seemed able to produce any sort of cohesive output, aside from fouls. All the while, to Malesani’s credit, Empoli continued on their way to their second goal of the match on a wonderful individual effort by Abate by the 51′ min of the second half.

Ranieri tried to salvage something from this game by injecting a bit of life in the form of Nocerino, Molinaro and Iaquinta into the match. To our luck, in the 81st minute we were able to secure a very much needed away goal. One that should provide us with a fair chance of advancing if we’re able to defeat Empoli on goal difference (home/away) at home come January 16. After a performance like this by both sides though that’s a big IF. I feel as though I should mention the outstanding efforts of Iaquinta so far this season. Not just because he might have saved our Italian Cup efforts, but he’s been taking advantage of every opportunity he’s been given and in return he’s enjoying his best start in Serie A with Juventus notching 6 goals in 11 appearances in primarily a substitute role. No doubt he deserves to start in attack alongside T-Rez in more than just a few matches this seaon. A sentiment Ranieri will probably continue to keep on ice for the likes of Tiago and Almiron.

Serie A: Day 14 vs. Milan

So damn close, so fucking damn close I guess it wasn’t all a houseleague affair this month, the game against Milan on the 1st of December did have its bright spots for Juventus I must admit. We certainly kept them on their back foot throughout the match even without Camo’s services. Really, too many standouts to name. End to end stuff with brilliant saves by both Buffon and Dida ( I know it’s weird to hear Dida and Buffon in the same breath). However, I’ll have to leave this match’s recap short with some ‘kind of’-highlights before my bitterness for this draw incapacitates my ability to form coherent sentences. Enjoy the highlights you grubby bastards!

Inter 37
Roma 32
Juventus 29
Udinese 28
Fiorentina 24

Next Match Serie A: Day 16 Lazio – Juventus
When: Saturday, December 15, 2007 8:30PM (local time)

IERI… OGGI… DOMANI… SEMPRE JUVE!


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Category Category: Players, Team News
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  • Chen Ke
    Our forward is world - class, and midfield is just a nightmare for me, i don't know why Ranieri choose Nocerino, it's his duty that we lost control in the midfield, midfield players have not scored for a fucking long time... i hope we can import Lampard next year.
    By the way, it's so nice to see all of you here, where are you guys from hey? I am a Chinese and I felt in love with the Bianconero 7 years ago.
  • kleo
    yo alll stupid nedved is one of the best players in juventus history he kinda of old but he still on jyuventus plans for another 3 years i guess cause he is powerful and lazio sucks juventus all da way babe
  • hahah its not like that sofia i swear, i'm just gonna give him more incentive til the end of the season. Then we'll have a big orgy.
  • sofia
    roberto- ohh see now you want his number....i see how it is.. when he starts performing everyone loves him well sorry man that is private information...

    Chen Ke - welcome!! you and i might have some trouble with the nocerino/tiago midfield argument but im sure you will come around :)
  • Chen Ke
    roberto, first of all i would like to thank you, maybe we should give Nocerino more time to complete himself, but still i insist to give more chances to Tiago, I think his wonderful delivery to the forward is what we need now.
    And, ho ho, in China juve fans may be not as many as inter(Juve is not good at marketing in China), but a survey showed that most of the fans are from
    upper class( i mean, wealthy and well-educated), anyway, let's keep winning. Well guys, welcome to China, be my guest( i am not kiding haha~).
  • Chen Ke, what's up? So you don't like Nocerino or our midfield? Come on, I know it was a rough game (possession wise) but you have to admire the other qualities of this midfield. You know sometimes a little grit and determination makes all the difference in the world.

    Tell me, how big is Juventus in China compared to other teams? A buddy of mine from Toronto is actually living over there right now, i'm sure you know him seeing as the population is over a billion. Cheers.
  • He certainly is taking his time. I liked the one-touch passes he made, this was probably the first game this season he semi-stood out. But damn, sofia give me ADP’s cell. I’m gonna have to do this guy some favours if he keeps this up. ;)
  • Chen Ke
    Our forward is world - class, and midfield is just a nightmare for me, i don't know why Ranieri choose Nocerino, it's his duty that we lost control in the midfield, midfield players have not scored for a fucking long time... i hope we can import Lampard next year.
    By the way, it's so nice to see all of you here, where are you guys from hey? I am a Chinese and I felt in love with the Bianconero 7 years ago.
  • sofia
    well put roberto. i completey agree. i don't think tiago was prepared for serie a, he doesn't seem to fit in.
  • Nocerino is always going to have an active attitude. He's a ball of energy, and a great talent. This kid will become better than Gattuso. For now though, until Tiago can build up his confidence on the pitch, Nocerino is the correct starter for this team.
  • Inter are away at Cagliari later today. Last time they met they tied 1-1. But, I'm almost positive Inter is going to win even though Ibra, Dacourt, Stankovic, Viera, Materazzi and Jimenez aren't playing...:(
  • sofia
    ok well despite what you guys think i think that as nocerino gains experience he will just get better.

    R.J i want trez to score as many goals as he can. i mean seriously the more the merrier (it applies to goals for juve too) :)

    who does inter play this week??

    alessio- i agree with you about the whole scudetto thing. as long as inter don't win it then i will be ok (and if juve get a CL spot). hopefully inter will just start losing and we can catch up if we keep winning.

    FORZA ADP :)
  • R.J.
    sofia, how many goals do you want trez to score?
  • Mike
    I wouldn't say Nocerino is amazing... I love his heart and his endurance, but the kid makes more mistakes per game than Britney Spears does per year.

    Tiago definitely looked good for the few minutes he was in against Lazio, and we shouldn't rule him out just yet.

    ...don't worry about Nedved, he should be fine. It takes more than a few stitches and blood to stop He-Man.
  • Alessio
    Because Tiago played great yesterday and really adds that creativity to our midfield we are so woefully lacking, especially without Camoranesi. Zanetti and Nocerino are good hard-working players, but they are both Gattuso-esque and we have no Pirlo at the moment delivering balls forward from midfield.

    The Toro tied up Roma, they are draw specialists it seems. I'm conflicted between being glad we gain ground on Roma and disappointed that Inter is running away...if Juve can't win the scudetto I'd rather any team, including Roma, take it over Inter.
  • sofia
    why???? nocerino is fucking amazing. tiago is shit. ADP WAS FUCKING AMAZING!!!!! great game...trez was nowhere to be seen after the first goal. i really hope nedved it alright. stitches on the hairline...as long as his hair is still ok :)

    im hoping roma and inter will lose or at least tie today but we will see..
  • Chen Ke
    What I want is to eliminate fucking Nocerino from the first team and let Tiago in.
  • I dont know where Chiellini thought that cross was heading on Pandev's second. I mean, maybe he thought he heard Buffon calling 'keeper' and decided not to put the ball out of play. But fuck, when your marking alongside your man you better not take any chances. He should have conceded the corner, he had position on the ball/man/buffon but it looked like he just stopped running... check it

    http://www.dailymotion.com/rel...

    Aside from a few other minor flaws I'm fucking happier than a pig in shit! Much like Sofia after ADP's brilliance. I don't know who this Ale kid is but he's a keeper.

    Adam, i can read the future and control the weather. That reminds me, I have to get ready and make it rain shit balls for roma and intermerda's next match tomorrow.
  • adam
    Oh u were so close to ur 3-1 prediction roberto. but a win is a win and once again juve proved they are the best. FORZA JUVE!!!
  • Mike
    grande Ale!

    ...shame we let up two stupid goals.

    Final: 2-3, Juve
  • Juventus 1 - Lazio 1
    Trez (29') Pandev (36')

    Great match thus far, terribly exciting wouldn't you say?
    Hello is there anyone here?

    Jesus i'm all alone aren't I, hahah
  • Looks likes Del Piero showed up for this one. Perhaps he got some last night.
  • Nice guys finish last anyways...

    Game's about to start... FORZA JUVEEEEEEE
  • R.J.
    i can be an asshole for sure...it's a byproduct of apathy. seriously though, i'm sure you're alright sofia. this game is on here in a bit...terribly hungover, did some illegal stuff last night.

    Trezeguet(1'5'6'8'90)
  • sofia
    roberto - i agree

    R.J - what makes you think you're my friend? why are you that special? to be honest with you i have many friends, most of which are male, and none of them are as much of a dick as you.
  • R.J.
    sofia, i was just wondering something. Are Roberto and I your only friends? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say yes. Two is better than zero i guess.
  • yes truly until then sofia... i definitely think Nedved will step it up this weekend. It's Nedved's weekend to shine.

    I'm taking bets.
  • sofia
    i agree. we need someone to step up and try to fill in for camo. i hope someone like nocerino starts to really step up and actually try again like he did before. i also hope that ADP will get back to being ADP, we have been seeing glimpses of it in the past few games but i hope to see him really unleash it this weekend. until then...
  • R.J.
    we could use some mid help since camo is back on the bench. we need to create as many scoring chances as possible seeing as we cannot afford many more loss/draws. we need 3 points everytime out, Inter is gonna run away with this thing if we dont.
  • sofia
    finally! great job anyway. haha we dont need lampard. but we signed that swedish kid which could be interesting. hopefully we will kill lazio tomorrow we need a morale booster after the shitty december we have been having, plus we have to fucking catch roma and inter the bitches...
  • I hate fucking transfer rumours! We've signed, dropped, and re-signed Lampard 15 times already!
  • M, don't worry. Devotion feels like that sometimes.
  • How could I have let slip those simple yet clear mistakes. It seems the monkey I've hired to write my posts this Christmas will have to die. Oh well, I could use a nice pair of slippers around the house.

    R.J., credit for picking up the Seinfeld caption- what a classic ep. Way less obvious than 'writting' hahah. I got to say though, can you find the Anchorman ref?
  • R.J.
    Good read Roberto. I love the hidden caption (if you will) for that nazi salute picture, I'm assuming you would be referring to the famous Seinfeld ep.

    Alessio, you bring up a good point about the fascism. It's funny how roman politics has been a historical regression. founded as a republic and lowered itself to fascim in the 20th century. it's frightening how that fascim can still exist in the 21st...i digress.

    Juventus - 6
    Lazio - 1 (on the obligatory penalty which juve's opponents seem to be awarded this season)
  • I looked for a prediction in the wrong place, and figured I was brilliantly going off on my own. Now I'm scared about being on the same wavelength as you.
  • Alessio
    Yeah, Roberto, Lazio isn't communist, they are direct opposite, they are well known for being fascists. Livorno supporters ARE left-wing, Lazio supporters are extremely-right wing. Hence why their games are so psycho.

    2nd correction- ADP and Iaquinta did great after Almiron's sending off against Empoli, not Atalanta. You know it's not Serie A if Almiron is playing.
  • Marco, you're right. Di Canio's gesture was more fascist then anything else.
  • Martha can I call you M? Great. Well, M, Camo's injury is just fucking terrible to the team as I've mentioned above. His presence will be greatly missed. But I for one would rather have him stay out longer (as much as it pains me so), and take all the time he needs to heal. I woudln't be able to stand him returning come January only to see him exacerbate his injuries again.

    Another thing, was my Lazio 1 - Juventus 3 prediction not realistic enough for you? Oh my, are you suggesting we'll win by more then a two goal margin? Why M, this is start of a beautiful relationship I think. ;)
  • We are totally the number 1 and only communist party of Serie A...
  • I think Camo might be the only Juve player I can stand, his injury is just brutal, even more for you than it is for me. (And I might be secretly hoping -- not very optimistically -- that Lazio's recent stint of actually being awake on the pitch continues this weekend. Realistically, what, 3-1 to Juve?)
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